Monday, 4 July 2011

Chasing Pavement

You know what, guys, I'm going to try to do the impossible.

I will put here what I tweet just now:

- My current predicted result for A level is 3As with C in GP and C/D in Econs. If luckily I can get a scholarsip, maybe to NTU.

- Then I will graduate and apply for a mediocre job. I'll be a mediocre employee who works just to get enough money to live.

- Maybe I'll meet someone in the office and maybe we'll get married. That's all. That's my mediocre future plan.

- But suddenly somebody is asking me to try for the impossible. I told him that it's just a waste of energy, because you know it's impossible.

- But if I'm forced to do it, I have to try to make the impossible possible. That's really not in my future plan.

- What I'm afraid of is that when I've tried to make the impossible possible and I still fail, I will be down and blame myself.

- I'll most probably blame myself for not studying hard enough since secondary school, for not reading enough book, for starting too late.

- Should I just keep chasing pavements even if it leads nowhere? (Haha the overused quotes)

- And when I fail I will lament over the wasted money and energy. Well yeah the problem is the probability of success is 0.01%.

- I'm supposed to lead a mediocre life. Why put myself in this trouble?

Yeah basically my point is summarized in those tweets. You know if I'm really going to do this impossible thing, I have to prepare for countless essays, interviews, SAT, and I have to work hard to ace Prelims. And the percentage of succeeding is still only 0.01%. Well if I get straight As for Prelim and 2300 for SAT, I would say the percentage will increase to 1%. There are many people in top schools who are going to get straight As for Prelim and maybe perfect score for SAT.

I'm not supposed to do this because I know it's impossible. Someone like me only has 0.01% in succeeding and believe me, it's not an understatement. Somebody who can do this kind of impossible stuff is the top scorer in my secondary school type of guy. I'm the plain lazy ass who never put 100% effort in everything, because I like it. I hate that miserable feeling that you get when you push yourself too much. That urge to shout "Why do I have to do this?" will keep coming to you.

So that is my two cents' worth on this issue. I will try, and I will give you the update next year.
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